The internet has a few incredibly depressing candidates to be Trump’s new FBI director
Do you have no interest in investigating Donald Trump’s alleged ties to Russia?
Are you a terribly unqualified white man who was born into tremendous privilege?
Well, son, do we have the job for you.
On Tuesday, Trump fired James Comey, the director of the FBI — which just so happens to be the agency looking into Russian interference in the 2016 presidential election, and the Trump campaign’s alleged ties to Russian operatives.
“A search for a new permanent FBI director will begin immediately,” read the official statement from the White House.
Don’t worry, Trump. Your search is already over.
A lot of people say Jared Kushner is too busy to add FBI director to his portfolio, but I’m sure Middle East peace is almost finished.
— Conor Friedersdorf (@conor64) May 9, 2017
I, for one, am confident about the objectivity of future FBI Director Jared Kushner.
— Meredith Shiner (@meredithshiner) May 9, 2017
Fuck. This means Jared’s running the FBI now doesn’t it.
— Gideon Yago (@gideonyago) May 9, 2017
The funny (terrifying?) thing is that’s not even the scariest scenario the internet could imagine.
Rudy Giuliani cracks his knuckles & smiles that reptilian smile
— Spencer Ackerman (@attackerman) May 9, 2017
“FBI Director Giuliani Announces New Charges for Hillary” – Fox News, 2018
— Steve Silberman (@stevesilberman) May 9, 2017
Um, any other suggestions?
Somewhere in the West Wing, Ivanka Trump is preparing the press release announcing her promotion from First Daughter to FBI Director
— Gloria Fallon (@GloriaFallon123) May 9, 2017
Actually this is probably the most qualified candidate of the bunch.
Lol, it’s funny because it’s a sign of our rapidly crumbling democracy. Remember kids, this is not normal. Sleep tight.