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‘Sharknado 5’ just got a perfectly terrible title and tagline – ANITH
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‘Sharknado 5’ just got a perfectly terrible title and tagline

‘Sharknado 5’ just got a perfectly terrible title and tagline


Summer time is here, and you know what that means: it’s Sharknado season.

Yup, Syfy returns in August with another installment of this ridiculous series. And as has become tradition, this one has a title that’ll make you groan.

Ready?

Syfy announced today that the fifth Sharknado movie shall henceforth be known as Sharknado 5: Global Swarming

And that’s not all. This one has an eyeroll-worthy tagline to match: “Make America Bait Again!”

Which … okay, sure, that’s a pretty good effort. “Global Swarming” is a cute pun – we can only assume it’s a reference to Pitbull’s 2012 album Global Warming. And “make America bait again” is equal parts obnoxious and catchy, which is the entire franchise’s M.O.

But as far as Sharknado titles go, it’s pretty weak. How do we know? Because we just spent the past few minutes putting together this definitive ranking of Sharknado titles. 

1. Sharknado

Behold, the title that started it all. “Sharknado” is movie title equivalent of, like, a KFC Double Down: it sounds so blisteringly awful that it comes all the way back around to being perversely intriguing. You know it’s junk food you’ll regret later, but you can’t resist digging in anyway. 

Plus, “Sharknado” is wonderfully descriptive – no confusing metaphors here. You know exactly what you’re going to get from a movie called Sharknado. As the tagline goes, “Enough said!” 

2. Sharknado 2: The Second One

How do you top a title like Sharknado? Well, you can’t, really. What you can do is lean into its obvious, glorious stupidity by slapping on a title like “The Second One.” This one also came with a dumb tagline: “Shark happens!”

3. Sharknado: The 4th Awakens

So what if Sharknado: The 4th Awakens has zip to do with the film from which it borrowed its title? The 4th Awakens is a perfectly shameless, mercenary title for a perfectly shameless, mercenary franchise. The marketing for The 4th Awakens really played up the Star Wars reference, even formatting its poster to resemble the Force Awakens one.

4. Sharknado 5: Global Swarming

Add some points for the pun, subtract some points for the fact that said pun has nothing to do with the number five.

5. Sharknado 3: Oh Hell No!

This is the sound of a bunch of marketing types shrugging their shoulders because, look, it’s a summer Friday and there are planes to catch and happy hour drinks to be had and no one has any better ideas anyway so let’s just go with it, okay?

Anyway, Sharknado 5: Global Swarming airs Sunday, August 6 at 8/7c on Syfy. Ian Ziering and Tara Reid will return, and celebrity cameos will include Fabio, Tony Hawk, Clay Aiken, Olivia Newton-John, Bret Michaels, Margaret Cho, Charo, and Gilbert Gottfried.



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Anith Gopal
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